According to one of my former students who wrote CXC Ordinary Level
last year, in order for men to have sex with virgins, they have
to go all the way down to 12 years, which effectively means primary
school.
Being judgemental is not naturally part of my character; however,
I wish to state my utter and complete objections to the sexual abuse
of children. I find it extremely sickening.
Innocence is lost at a very early age, which, unfortunately more
often than not, leads to the complete destruction of what once was
a budding life.
Quite a large percentage of child sexual abuse takes place within
the home. The perpetrator is often a father, stepfather, uncle or
live-in boyfriend.
A vendor in the Port of Spain Central Market was having sex with
his then 14-year-old daughter and he was doing so to make sure that
she knew what to do when she had to “take a man.”
This is a fact he was proud of. In another instance, a very young
girl was molested by her uncle while her father was in jail for
two years for a crime he didn’t commit.
The father was eventually released, but the damage had already been
done to the child.
The father was advised by those who knew the case not to retaliate
against the uncle.
He agreed, and said that he would leave it in the hands of Allah.
He wanted to concentrate on rebuilding his family.
This was quite an admirable trait and I myself suggested that he
move on. However, I don’t know if I would have been that strong
and that forgiving. In fact, had it been my daughter, the uncle
would have been ...
One of the most effective ways of protecting your child is through
communication since molesters and paedophiles get their power through
secrecy.
The child has to feel comfortable discussing sensitive matters with
their parents.
If they feel they can talk with you about their true feelings and
they will not be “put down” for it, then they will be
more likely to tell you when they are put in an uncomfortable situation
by a child molester. Children also need to know that there are many
adults who can help if they have a problem.
In a society where a fascination for deflowering a virgin has become
somewhat trophy like, and with HIV/AIDS spreading rapidly among
youths, the government and citizens must take every possible precautionary
step to significantly reduce this scourge.
For those old men and women who are thinking of molesting young
boys and girls, seek help. Don’t rob them of their innocence.
As a means of protecting our children, I have made a list of observable
behaviour patterns that parents should look for in possible molesters:
1. The molester is most usually an adult male, however, teenagers
and women do molest children;
2. They are usually married.
A small number never marry and maintain a lifelong sexual and emotional
interest in children;
3. They may relate better to children than adults;
4. May have few close adult friends;
5. Usually prefer children in a specific age group;
6. Usually prefer one gender over another;
7. May seek employment or volunteer in programmes that involve children;
8. They may pursue children for sexual purposes and may feel emotionally
attached; for example, an adult man may spend a lot of time with
his neighbour’s children or children of his relatives, talking
at length about his feelings of loneliness and loss in an attempt
to get the child’s sympathy;
9. May take photographs of their victims in the nude or collect
child pornography;
10. May possess alcohol or narcotics and give them to children to
lower their inhibitions;
11. May talk with children in ways that equalise their relationship;
12. May offer to babysit; and
13. May be seen in places where children congregate regularly.
I am asking parents to pay attention to these signs, talk to your
children and let us begin, together, to stamp out this unwanted
phenomenon. |
